Values provide us with important information about what is important to our lives. However, it is also critical that we look at how our behavior lines up with our values. Usually, there are some ways that we are acting consistent with our values. In addition, there are often ways that we are behaving which are inconsistent with our values.
For example, maybe one of my top values is ‘Family,’ but I’m not spending time with family members, not consistently calling my parents or siblings, or maybe don’t have a family of my own. This is important information. Essentially there are two things this could mean.
First, if I truly value family, then I’m probably not going to be as happy if I’m not spending time with family members. This may lead us to change something about our behavior so that our behavior lines up better with our values and lead to more happiness. We will explore this more in the next Values worksheet.
Alternatively, if I’m not acting in ways consistent with my values, this could mean I actually value something else more. This is totally alright, because as we said before, there are no good or bad values. Said another way, there are no values that are inherently better than other values – they are just different.
Sometimes we might have guilt that we value something over something else, but that guilt does not help us and we need to let that go (we will explore this more in other handouts).
Click the picture above or the link below to access a free pdf copy of the Values Worksheet 3.